Bopha* is thin and frail but possesses a commanding presence. She speaks softly, yet her words carry the intensity of a young woman overcoming past trauma with an unwavering determination to succeed. She has quite literally grown up in Damnok Toek, having been rescued from homelessness, abuse, and street scavenging when she was merely 8 years old. Today, she is 22, in her second year at university, and is ready and willing to reflect on her past in order to help children who are suffering the same fate as she once did.
The difficulties she would experience throughout much of her childhood began when she was just a baby. Bopha’s father left the family before she was born, and her mother struggled with her mental health. She remarried a man who had problems with substance abuse and was himself a drug trafficker. The new husband convinced her mother to move the family to Thailand. What her mother didn’t know was that she and her family had also been tricked into inadvertently smuggling drugs across the border. Unfortunately for them, they were stopped by the Thai authorities at the border checkpoint.
“When the police came, I ran with my mother to escape them. We hid in the sewers but eventually, they found us and we were separated.” Their mother was arrested and the children were deported back to Cambodia.
Bopha’s aunt came to the border to pick up the children and bring them back to her house. However, they were desperately poor. Her uncle was unable to work due to a physical disability, meaning her aunt had to go out during the day to scavenge in order to support her own six sons, as well as Bopha and her two sisters.
That’s when the sexual abuse started.
With her aunt absent during the day, the male relatives began to abuse Bopha and her sisters. However, the abuse was not confined just to the household. “It is difficult to speak about it because it happened to us so many times. From my neighbours, my male relatives and my uncle, both young and old men. It was not just me. My sisters were also sexually abused by these men.”
It left her weak, both physically and mentally. Even to this day, she has physical ailments due to her small size that prevent her from carrying a heavy backpack or travelling long distances on her bicycle.
Presumably to stop the abuse, Bopha’s older sister, herself only about 12 years old, decided it was better to fend for themselves and brought her sisters to scavenge on the street. It was a tough life, and Bopha and her sisters suffered from malnutrition. Out of necessity, her eldest sister developed the habit of stealing food, clothing, and toys from the community to provide for Bopha and her younger sisters. “Because I was so young, I did not realise that she was supporting us by stealing,” Bopha recalls.
It was in this state that Bopha and her sisters were found by Damnok Toek’s outreach team. Bopha and her younger sister were brought into the care of the Reception Centre (RC). Unfortunately, their older sister disappeared and our social workers were unable to locate her.
A Fresh Start
At the Reception Centre, Bopha thrived. Finally in a safe environment, she was able to explore the different activities DT offers children including handicrafts, dancing, and mediation. She was deeply traumatized from her past when she arrived and spoke slowly and softly. While she reports she still suffers from mental health issues associated with her childhood, the activities she learned at the centre have given her the tools to manage the trauma.
Because she had yet to receive any education, she was enrolled in the advanced classes taught through the RC. At age 14 she was mentally and emotionally prepared to transfer to the Non-Formal Education program where she completed Grade 6. She continued to secondary school the year after and with every passing year continued to advance in her studies.
Damnok Toek staff marvelled at her positive attitude, excellent behaviour, and her determination to overcome her past and succeed in her new life. She became a role model at the Reception Centre and, as she grew older, began to assist staff members in helping with some of the younger children.
At 16 years old, Bopha outgrew the Reception Centre and was transferred to a semi-independent Group Home supported by Damnok Toek and supervised by DT social workers. Her supervisor remarks that she always obeys the rules and regulations of the Group Home and has never had an issue with her roommates.
Because of her incredible progress and personal growth during her time with Damnok Toek, she was offered a position in DT’s Peer Educator program. This program focuses on capacity building and soft skills training for youth in the Poipet area. Peer Educators are welcome to join any Damnok Toek project at any time to use these skills in a real-world setting and gain hands-on experience volunteering in the community. They frequently participate in the Mobile Library, Mobile Rehab, Outreach missions, emergency food distribution, and, most recently, Covid-19 prevention awareness–raising sessions.
Looking To The Future
Inspired by the DT staff, Bopha hopes to one day start a mobilized Peer Educator program to spread the knowledge and skills she has learned from DT to youth across a wider area. She is in her second year at university studying Business Management. After graduation, she wants to find a way to give back to the community using her life experience, the tactics she has learned to manage her past trauma, the skills she has gained through the Peer Educator program, and the motivation she has received from DT staff.
“In my past I was homeless,” she says with a hint of defiance, “so when I see children who are living on the streets, I see my younger self in them. I want to do this work as well as the DT staff to help vulnerable children receive the kind of help that I received from Damnok Toek.”
*The name has been changed to protect anonymity.
